**Warning: these entries may be graphic and, hopefully, frightening. Keep in mind this is merely fiction. No humans (or animals) have or will be harmed in the production of this blog. All names have been chosen at random and are not meant to represent anyone, living or dead. Any similarities are purely coincidental**
10/20/13 2:15 PM
My “date” with Natalie was an epic disaster. All that excitement, fantasizing, and wishful
thinking was in vain. Huge mistake! She was never interested in me and I was a
fool to think otherwise.
At the end of our shift she was giddy and chattering
away. She convinced me to ride with her
to the party-mistake number two. She was
introducing me around and it all seemed to be going great. She was laughing at my jokes we made fun of
some of our coworkers and bonded over some drinks. All of the sudden, she gets a text and says, “Oh
darn, Brian is running late.” Before I
can even ask who Brian is, a hulking steroidal freak comes up behind her and
lifts Natalie into the air, twirling her around. Next thing I know, she’s playing tonsil hockey
with the walking muscles. I stood there,
stunned trying to figure out what happened.
When she’s finally on the floor again she introduces me to her boyfriend,
Jeremy or Jackass or something. As it
turns out, my date was running late.
Yeah, you guessed it-her cousin, Brian.
She thinks I’m GAY!!! I tried to
tell her I’m not gay and she says to me, “There’s nothing to be ashamed of, it’s
okay to be gay.” To which her douchebag boyfriend made a crude, homophobic
remark. I ignored him for the moment to
tell her that if I was-and I stressed was- gay, I wouldn’t be ashamed but I am absolutely
not gay. I tell her I appreciate the
thought but I’m going to go home. That’s
when I realize that I have no car. I was
so devastated, I was ready to walk back home.
Natalie started crying, apologizing and insists that Jackass drive me
back to the restaurant. So he’s driving,
she’s in the front seat next to him and I’m in the backseat, wishing I was
dead. The tires barely hit the parking
lot and I dashed out of the car and sprint to my car. Next thing I know, Natalie is running behind
me, bawling. She hugged me and begged me
to forgive her. Damn, she felt so good
in my arms. I didn’t want to let
go. She pecked my cheek and apologized
again. I couldn’t help it. I told her
not to worry about it. I’m such a sucker
where she’s concerned. I can still smell
her perfume on my shirt. I’m tempted to
never wash it again.
Now, here’s where I find redemption. As I was pulling out, I notice they’re both
standing outside the car, arguing. I can
see that she’s upset and he’s screaming at her.
Then he signed his own death certificate. He slapped her. I followed them from a distance. Natalie never went back into the party. She immediately jumped in her car and drove
home. I wanted to follow her, console
her, make love to her, but she was too upset.
Besides, Jackass needed my attention more than she did. When the vile pig finally staggered out from
the party he had a trashy blonde bimbo climbing all over him. He might have nailed her right there on the
hood of his car but I’m not positive.
First he hits Natalie, then he cheats on her…yeah this jerk needs to
die. I followed him and his new slut to
someone’s apartment. They were going at
it again the whole way to their room. I
listened in the hallway-they never bothered to lock the door. Why are people so stupid? I waited a while, until the grunting and “Oh
yeah, baby” shouts ended. Then there was
silence. I tiptoed inside. They were sprawled out on the bed-naked but
what really caught my attention was the sleek rubber tubing next to a lit
candle, a torched spoon and a syringe.
He’s a junkie. I don’t have to
worry at all. They’re out cold and there’s
enough junk there to make sure he never wakes up. I load another syringe and inject, then
another and another and another. Finally
he convulses and I know he’s gone. As I
drove home, I look down at my leather driving gloves and smile. The best twenty bucks I’d ever spent. Again, no prints-not that anyone is going to
check on a junkie overdose.
I’m glad I have today off. I am exhausted but who knows…maybe after an
appropriate grieving time Natalie will give me another shot.
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